I Love It!

You know those songs that affect you sooo much when they come on.. you know the ones that make you dance like an impossiable white child and sing at the top of your lungs. The one you can't sit still through and must turn the volume up the ENTIRE way till your neighbors knock on your door and yell... or dance with you.. I love songs like that! there should be more in this world, then everyone would be 'dancing' and singing and driving with the windows down, and less people would get shot.. I'm a firm believer that music is the answer.. at least for me. what it your song?

Beni-friends

I'm feeling better now.. thank you for all the prayers!
I was thinking tonight, after the girls left, about benifriends... how many girl and guys have them in this world? a TON I'm not one for that right now.. before yes but right now not so much. But I was just thinking about the concept and about what my friend said.. She said that when she and this guy were making out without an attachment, she missed her ex more and felt more empty after an encounter with her benifriend than she did before the time spent in total 'make-me-feel-good" bliss. So, what's the point? really?

I went to the nurse! and she speaks English!

So yesterday my mom almost talked me into going to the ER for my 'illness'; she did really well, I actually drove the entire way there and then chickened out and never went in... I figured my 'illness' wasn't an emergency and could wait until tomorrow to see the nurse. Our nurse here at Nyack isn't really a nurse, just a nurses assistant. and she doesn't really have the best English. So I went anyway.. when I got to the office door I was met with the sight of what appeared to me to be a fort... a whole bunch of boxes stacked up on top of oneanother to form a wall around the door. So I got through the little opening and realized why the 'fort' was built. The nurses office is flooded! and since they weren't open yesterday for MLK day the room smelled of mildew! gross... now i can add nauseous to my symptom list. So we 'talked' I understood about 48% of what she said.. (which is good). So she was going to refer me to a clinic so I could see a doctor. So she takes my blood pressure, which is low as always, health professionals never believe you about that sort of thing, it's like if you went to the mechanic and they asked you if your car is red and then had to go and look to make sure you know what red is.... (bad example I know but I'm on these great meds that make it ALL ok!) So then she took my temp. which I thought would be fine, but I guess I was working from comparison and i did have a fever, mild but there, of 100 degrees. So I went to the clinic.. my first time, kinda made me feel, I don't know how it made me feel, just strange.... and the nice doctor just gave me my perscription in samples from these kitchen cabnets they had in the back... don't worry I checked them out and they are what they say they are and they do what they say they do. So now I'm on the mend finally I hope... I should be better in a week or so... well off to try to eat something for the day.. I'm so sick of soup!

Is it cold in here?

So here's a quick update on my life so if fancy pants or my dad are reading they can be updated on what it going on...
**PS**
Fancy pants.. sorry I called you a girl, I guess I was mistaken...it was nice to meet you
**back**
So I am at school now.. working my tail end off.. I left at 4am to drive back here on Mon, that was nice, no traffic and I didn't feel like I had been traveling all day.. it took me about 61/2 hours to get here (it usually takes 7 or 8). Classes started yesterday, I am the only student in one of my classes, that's strange. and I found out that I'm going to be the only student in one of my other classes as well. Sooo.. I'm just getting TONS of one on one time with my profs. (yeah and all amounts of joy)
I am working at the Picture People still, about 28-30 hrs a week this semester. I also am working at this after school program JCCY (don't ask me what it stands for, one of the J's stands for Jewish I know that but that's where my knowledge stops) I love both jobs and suprisingly they don't take up all my time this semester... I have a GREAT schedule! I am also teaching again in Tappan my students are sooo sweet.. we moved class to Thurs. nights though so now I'm busy from 6:30-about 9pm on Thurs.
I am not dating anyone right now, I have a couple friends that give me my guy fix when I need some testasterone (totally spelled wrong). It's nice to have them around.
UMMMM... dad I think there was something else, another topic I was sopposed to update you on.. but I can't remember.. I'm on these great drugs for this sickness I have (please pray)

Things I Already Know

So I am updateing for the sake of killing some time. I have given up on the thought that anyone actually reads this.
Christmas..
for Christmas I got my digital camara, as soon as I figure how to get the pictures off the card and onto the computer and then onto the internet you will be able to see illustrations for this lovely blog!
The Day After...
For the day after Christmas we went to my gram Havener's to celebrate Christmas with that side of the family. In true Havener style we ate at Ponderosa. We are a party of 27 and we fit in the tinyest room ever we had to bring in chairs and roll our own silverware, it was an experiance. Then we went back to my Aunt Cindy's for presents and deserts. (I don't know why we don't just have deserts, then the whole thing would take less time) The presents are also kinda a practice in futility, No one gets anything they like, next year we should just exchange 5 dollars and have it over with. Really it was fun though, they are getting more normal as time goes on, there were only a few mishaps.
The Week After...
My Gram and Pap celebrated 50 years of blissful marriage on the 30th. We threw them a suprise party at the Cottage. We didn't know if we would be able to get them there because we couldn't tell them and they weren't making things easy. We told soo many lies, that my aunt from CA wasn't coming and then that my Aunt Danielle's family was haveing a party at the Cottage and they had to come (they declined that invite) and then that my aunt from CA was in and would she please get her butt to dinner with their family.. So they got there.
The Next Day..
At the suprise party we suprised my gram and pap by telling them that we were all coming to thier house the next day for my Lane family christmas. The lane family christmas is pretty good. The food is good. We get closepin cookies, and bean caserole, plus the people can be more normal (at times.) This year my Uncle Ronnie made swords for all the little kids, that was a stroke of genius. He also brought Fancy Pants (who is black and also who he believes to be a boy) (the black is right, the boy is not).

My sisters and I decided that we should at least get something out of this whole thing, we do both families each year. So we are going to publish the oddity of our families. It will be a reverse book, (one that you flip over and read something totally diff, kinda like the direction books that come in English and Chineese) The Havener document will be titiled, "WE'RE DRIVING REALLY SLOW" which comes from my father saying that to us when we got lost. (driving slow would not help, we were going in the opposite direction and were in the SalVal parking lot). The Lane Family's title is "WOULD ANYONE LIKE WATERMELLON:so would I" Which is my Pap's favorite thing to say when there is no watermellon but he offers anyway and puts you in the mood for it.

I really need to post more often so my posts aren't this long... oh well, like I said no one reads this.

I hate the MTA

So yesterday I was sopposed to go to see Chitti-Chitty-Bang-Bang with my buddy Dustin. But... I'll tell you the end, We never saw the musical, we drove to the city and never got out of the car, in fact we didn't do anything that we planned to do. So why may you ask did this all happen, and why do I hate the MTA in New York? well let me enlighten you. (I'm not bitter... you should just know that coming into this) :P so... the MTA is on strike, because of some benifits of somthing stupid like that, basically from what I gather, they are getting benifits that were needed 40 yrs ago but are irrelevent now and so the Gov. is cutting them out of the new workers pkgs. So they are on strike. now about the musical (The MTA will tie in here in a bit) so we left a little later than we had planned because we decieded to do lunch at his place instead of in the city... hey we are both poor, and the food was prolly better. So we left with about 2 hrs to play with, and those two hours didn't include the 45 min that we planned on being in the theater before the musical started. So really we had 2 hrs and 45 min to drive into Manhattan on a Tues night and park and walk the 4 city blocks to the theater. Not a problem. Except for the MTA strike. See when they went on strike they stopped everything that runs into the city, buses, trains, and even some roads. So basically to get in you have to drive, traffic was heavier than a reg. tues night but not bad... we got in in about 45 min. So then we were trying to find this parking garage, because again we are poor and can't afford to park in downtown Manhattan without a cupon (which we had for this particular garage)
*Sillyness engulfs me*
I'm at Dustin's right now and Pablo (his roomie) is singing at the top of his lungs, I don't think he knows I am here... he's not bad but really funny (especially when he wails to the music)
*back to the rant*
So the garage is on 5th and 43rd, we got there and they have closed down 5th ave!! who does that!! (because they were picketing in Grand Central) so finally we talked to this one nice cop and he let us "illegally" go down 5th to get to where we needed to go... this is now about 30 min before the show is sopposed to start... we were both frustrated from driving around for about an hour and a half. .. so we get to the garage that we think it is.. and its the wrong one, the one we wanted was a little up 5th the other direction... so we finaly just left the city.. :( but don't worry our night was not totally ruined until he told me that his disorganized facade was just that and that he really had reservations at some really nice resturant for after the show and that we were going to see the tree and all this stuff... and I was soo upset.. so we went to the mall for dinner and go cheesecake from the cheesecake factory and a musical on DVD (My Fair Lady) and we went back to his place and just chilled.. basically it was a good night.. I mean it wasn't anything that we expected it to be. but... it's all relative... I did get to see a heck of a lot of the city when we were driving around and I got to see a musical, even if is was just on his screen while I sat on the couch. but really I cant complain.. a great time was had by all..... I hate the MTA... if you work for them, you ruined my wonderful evening and the best christmas present I would have gotten this year... so there!!!

Just an update

Procrastination to Hit All Time High
With finals around the corner and upon me, I can use all the prayer that you can give. My toughest final is tonight at 6pm, it's my Methods final so wish me luck and toss up a prayer.. other than that, finals are going swimmingly.

Hispanic Community Outraged
For my Spanish final today I had to know the parts of a car. I am a firm believer that if I am in a foreign country AND if I have a car AND if that car breaks and needs fixed; I am not below pointing and making noises to get my point accross. I am a believer that not even most hispanic women know some of these car parts.. I don't know most of them in English.. It's an outrage.

Country Girl to Return to Mars
Not by space travel but I will be going home in about a week and a half. (I will get home on the 22nd late). I can't wait to get home and see everyone, whom I miss (a little).

Postal Service on Strike
I hope they are and that explains the disappearance of my homemade study pack (including two randomly added, non packaged tea bags) It's no where to be found and Roberto can't find it or make it appear although he is amazing!

Amazing Grace

"Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound, That saved a wretch like me....I once was lost but now am found,Was blind, but now, I see.

T'was Grace that taught...my heart to fear.And Grace, my fears relieved.How precious did that Grace appear...the hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils and snares...we have already come.T'was Grace that brought us safe thus far...and Grace will lead us home.

The Lord has promised good to me...His word my hope secures.He will my shield and portion be...as long as life endures.

When we've been here ten thousand years...bright shining as the sun.We've no less days to sing God's praise...then when we've first begun.

"Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound, That saved a wretch like me....I once was lost but now am found,Was blind, but now, I see.

Amazing Grace

I was sitting in Chapel on Mon. and I had a 'moment' an ephany if you may. So I thought I'd share it here:
You can't fully understand the impact of that line in 'Amazing Grace' untill you have felt the fear that the grace of your salvation can bring upon your heart. But being a believer I know that the grace of my salvation can releive that fear- fear of what I'm not sure maybe it's fear of being discovered in your sins, maybe a fear of seperation form Christ. Whatever that fear is it is real and it is strong and it is lousy
Your grace is amazing! amazing that you would still love see me, a sinner. That you would still love me, even though I am a sinner. God-it is unthinkable that you would forgive me of the unforgivable- you deserve all the glory and honor that a sinner such as I can give. God pleas remember me ... as the sinner on the cross pled with you.. remember me in the face of your Father. Remember me and don't let me stray too far from your throne. Father bring me back... love on me. mend me as only you can.

Just don't ask

Just thought I should make it public knowledge that Jimmy and I are no longer seeing eachother or even talking, per his request. SO incase you see me and want to ask about how he's doing or anything like that ... don't, cause I don't know, I don't have his phone number, I don't know his email (that's a lie) I don't talk to him, his sister, his mother, his grandmother or Joe for that matter. So don't ask, and if you want to, don't. and don't start your sentence like "I know you two broke up but..." or "I know you prolly don't know, but how it Jimmy doing?" you would be right with the last one, I wouldn't know. So don't ask, and if you meet someone who should know this, pass it along, in fact pass it along to everyone you know, cause I don't know how Jimmy is doing and I'm sick of having to tell people that. Just don't ask.

Just cause I should

This post is just cause I should
-just cause I should be studying
-just cause I should write in this blog every once in a while
-just cause I should be studying (did I mention that already I really should be)
-just cause I should write in here so my mom can know what's going on with me
-just cause I should no be eating junk food while I am doing this
-just cause I should be going to the gym tomorrow
-just cause I should be packing my stuff to move out
-just cause I should be thinking about how my GPA is going to drop due to this semester
-just cause I should be wondering how I am going to go 2 more weeks without seeing my Alex
-just cause I should be studying (did I mention that already?)
This is a post just cause I should post and get back to life as I know it, just cause I should

Make New Friends But Keep the Old

I just got the sweetest letter from a dear friend, well I don't know if I could call her a friend. She was by 6th and 7th grade English teacher.
I was thinking about her the other day and how much she had impacted me. How I wouldn't be studying what I am here at Nyack if it weren't for her. So I dropped her a line, nothing fancy just a quick update on where I was and what I was studying and a thank you for her dedication to the profession. So I sent it and didn't think another thing about it till today when I went to my mailbox and there was a LETTER!! (hint: by the excitement I get over letters you can see that I love getting them and I don't get them often, Drop me a line whenever!) The letter was from Mrs. Pringle! She was so grateful for the letter, that she wrote one of her own, although it was nothing spectacular, it was mail and the gesture was much appriciated! She is so sweet. Yeah for old friends from forgotten places... I miss you Forest Hills!

I Passed

I PASSED!! 256 on my ATSW!! I can still be a teacher in New York if I want to be!

The eX factor

I love ex-boyfriends. Today seems to be the day for them. I was thinking about Jimmy the other day and just wondering what he was up to and all that jazz... not pineing over him or wondering because there are any strong feelings there.. (There aren't) But just cause he's my friend and I haven't talked to him in a long time. So I was thinking about IMing him so that if he wanted to continue not talking, he could just ignore it. But if, on an off chance, he decieded that he wanted to talk, he could respond. So I got online this morning and he was away.. so I sat there checking every so often (more often than I'll admit) to see if he was back. Then I finally gave up and started picking up my room (which is a disaster!) and I heard the little noise that says someone loves me and is talking to me.. and guess who it was... Jimmy... really strange huh.. well then we talked and it wasn't like the other times we talked, he wasn't pushing an agenda, he wasn't trying to 'win me back'. It was just two friends catching up on what they had missed in the last month and a half.
**SIDE NOTE**
I realized how boring of a life I lead.. first of all I haven't had anything new to write in here in a loong time. I keep thinking, 'I should update that but I dont have anything to write.' I didn't have anything new to tell Jimmy when he asked what I had been up to.. how lame is my life
**Coming back to me**
So Jimmy and I talked, then tonight I was playing scrabble with Dustin, and his brother Jeremy and Mandi. It was fun, Mandi was really tired and Jeremy was a little on the way to being drunk but other than that, scrabble was fun. So the was ex number 2 and now I'm talking to Jason. ex number 3, and really I dont know if I can count him as an ex. we were so young.. and stupid. So anyway.. it just seems like I am destined to keep in touch with the guys I date. I dont't have a problem with that, but mostly they do.. at first then they realize that we had a great friendship and that it's worth it to try to keep that going..
so there you have it.. don't jump down my throat for talking to Jimmy, I know you want to but.. well it's my life and really I'm glad to be back in contact with him. he's a great friend.

Mandi's 21st Birthday

Most people spend their 21st at a bar or at least out having fun. Well mandi and I decided that since we didn't get to go thrift shopping together before, we would go on her birthday (Wed.) sound like fun huh? So we set out with our (what we thought then) good directions and our full tank of gas. We were going to two different thrift shops. One in Pearl River and one in White Plains... a little far we knew but for a 21st anything right? Well we got lost when our directions turned out to be wrong (but only at the last part), so we got directions from this church and when we got there it was kinda a bust except that we got these really cool classics. They had a GREAT book selection (we'll have to go when you come up sisters)! So then we were going to go to the one in White Plains. And again our directions weren't the best (but only at the end) and so we were lost and Mandi got out to ask directions and we found out that North Broadway was the other way so we turned around ( with some difficulty). And then we were looking for 39 N. Broadway and we saw signs for 12 N. Broadway and then 13 N. Broadway and so on till about 20 N. Broadway then the next one was 44 N. Broadway, don't ask me how but it was. So finally after asking directions from a very unhelpful traffic cop we found the place and Mandi couldn't find her wallet it must have fallen out when we stopped to ask directions so we went back and it was there, with all her money only her Subway card was missing (not really but we thought it would have been funny) So we go back to the Thrift Store and we find out that its only open on Tues from 10-4! AGHHH .. so we get back in the car and try to go home, after some more bad direction (these coming from the Birthday Girl) we were on our way home... laughing all the way.. Mandi and I are adventured out for now I think, but tomorrow is a new weekend, we were thinking maybe this time we'll tackle the city! it could be fun :)

The Events That Followed

So as afore mentioned I went to my roommates house this weekend for "Fall Break". We did a TON of stuff, like 'doing wood'. It rained a lot so we didn't do much wood but I got to fill the cart once and help unload it into the basement, it was an experiance to say the least and I decieded I will never heat my house with wood. We also played this game, Pit. It was totally fun and loud and I decieded I am going to have to get it so we can play sometime up here at school. it wasn't quite as loud untill Kelly came home and Kyle stopped by... they add to the fun! We also played scrabble with TJ and Megan. it was possiably the best game of scrabble that I have ever played (not that I play often) even though we own the game now. Megan's famous word that is still stuck in my head. IDODOLO- the cousin to the DODO bird. (no we didn't let her play it) We also ate dougnuts off a sting, there are pictures which you will never see cause I look totally stupid! Then on the way home we had sooo much fun. Well at first it wasn't. The plan was to go to a thrift shop on the way home so we left in plenty of time and got there but as we are walking toward the store Mandi realizes she still has her dad's keys in her pocket and we scrapped that and had to go home to take the keys back. So we decided with the little time we had extra we would stop at any random point on the road trip to take a crazy picture. (if my web-master would show me how to publish pic you could see them *Stasi*) We took ones with pigs and a campaign sign that says I LIKE MIKE FLANAGAN! (if you live in Greene vote for Mike for me, I love his signs!) and we took ones next to a rhinosarus and did I mention the real live pigs and the bicikle tied to a sign and Mandi climbing the tree in her bare feet (or trying to at least).. we had so much fun.. I'm sure I am forgetting something but such is life... and now I must return to it so I can study for this exam in Spanish! YEAH!

The Starting Line-up

This past weekend was our fall break, if you can call it that. (we had Mon off until 6pm! o goody) So I went upstate to Mandi's. She lives in the middle of nowhere and they have a barn and a pond and they tap trees to make syrup and they heat their house with wood, that they chop and store themselves! they are really amazing people to me. I got to see her dad again, he is wonderful! like a little Larry Poston. and Emily, her sister who is such a doll, we stayed in her room even though she was sick... she's such a doll (agian) And I got to meet a whole slew of people from her other family. TJ her brother who is getting married and good thing otherwise I would try to steal him (still might) Really I'm just kidding cause I got to meet his fiance and she is soooo sweet and soooo pretty and has such a gentle spirit. they are so cute together! I hope I am that cute with my fiance when I get afianced! I went with Megan (TJ's fiance) to get her dress fitted and that was fun, it is gorgeous and Mandi and Emily got their bridesmaids dresses which looked wonderful on them. Also this past weekend I got to meed Mandi's step-mom, Donna, she's such a homemaker and loves haveing company which is evident by her hospitality toward me. She recently broke her ankle by falling down some stairs at work, so she was just getting up and about. I also got to meet Kelly, Mandi's stepsister who was so pretty and... I guess strong-willed would describe her best. And her brother Kyle, who looks a lot younger than he is I guess (I never really got an age on him) He is ... loud and has a great sence of humor. OH and unexpectedly I got to meet her cousins, or second cousins or something like that. Rebecca and Elis. They used to live in Colorado but then they decided they were having a mid-life-crisis together so they quit their jobs and roadtripped across the states to NY and are now bunking with Mandi's parents till they decide where they want to be. (a little crazy I think but to each his own). So that's it as far as family. I also got to meet Jenny and Tom who are good friends of Mandi's, they are sweet, Jenny is just like mandi (almost) and tom is a sweetheart, and good at small talk which we made a lot of as Mandi and Jenny caught up with eachother. I met Platta who is her swim coach from HS and loved him from the start! So that's it for the new people I met this weekend the next thing will be to tell you what we did now that you know the characters.

Just some news

To Take HUGE Test in Near Future
I will be taking my ATS-W the second of three certification tests this weekend (Sat at 1pm to be exact if you wanna pray for me) Much prayer is needed. I need to pass this to stay on track with the plans I am making regarding my student teaching and such. I will be taking my CST in the Spring. (updates: scores to follow in a few months)

Small Time Girl to Becomes Heavy Lifter
Rachel and Mandi and I have been going to the gym for the last two weeks (and loving it). We are going to begin lifting on Wed. mornings... if you would like to join us ever we leave Christie around 6:20am, give us a call.

Homesickness Epidemic has Reached Epic Proportions
I am beginning to feel homesick (something I've been fighting for the last few days) I am looking forward to coming home in Nov. for a while for Thanksgiving. (key words there: *A While*)

Trip to Green Is On
Hoping to have my picture taken in the beautiful town of Green by their tree and their founders statue (again I would like to post some pics of it all for you but my web coordinator hasn't set that up yet) (*staz*). But there will be verbal descriptions to follow. I love that I'm from Mars and Mandi is from Green. We make quite a pair.

Seperation Anxiety to be Felt Throughout the US
My roomate is leaving me to go live in seclusion as a monk for a semester in Mexico. Ok that's a little dramatic but it couldn't be worse. I am already missing her. Please pray that we both accept this new venture with great ease.

Who knew?

WHO KNEW:
1 that really out of shape people can run 2 miles three days in a row under 20 min. (Yeah for out of shape me!)
2 The craving for chocolate can become so bad that it goes in the opposite direction and you detest the sight or smell of the stuff (I hate boys)
3 Talking to your ex boyfriend(s) can be theropudic on a bad day
4 Who knows how to spell theropudic
5 Roommates can gett annoyed by you and not even tell you till life really sucks then all the sudden they get chatty
6 I love my roomate because she's beautiful
7 That I can only think of 7 who knews on this horrablly awful day

The New Me

I'm taking up coffee and early morning running, I'm becoming a new person! (the exclamation is not an expression of joy, even though that's what it always means when you see one, but grammatically it doesn't have to be about joy, it could just be about astonishment or revelation, that's what this one is about) I am becoming a new person, one who runs at 7am, and drinks coffee afterwards and one who is married to her work (not my school work though so it's really not as good a thing as you think it might be) and I'm becoming one of those people who updates their blog everyday (or close to it) becaue they have noone else to talk to except themselves, I dont think that's my problem, I just have words stuck inside of me that can't get out no matter how hard I try to get rid of them they only just change languages or grow bigger! (again astonishment) I don't know what to do except blow them onto this screen and out into the world, hopeing against all hope that they will eventually find a place to be and they will stay there and stop tomenting me.... I'm becoming a new person